Summer begins...

school ends...

... I WAS wearing heels -- they are just TALL!!!

HonuGirl

Past comfort…

Present pancakes – perfect peace.

Whoosh ~ the present moment was gone. Oddly I was back many years ago remembering days at my parents' house.

I'm the oldest of siblings still at home – and the only one allowed to stay up late enough to watch Dad prepare for his graveyard shift at his full-time job; which (barely) afforded him to continue his calling – full-time pastor of a small church.

After working his eight hour job; he'd catch a short nap, then spend the mornings with my younger siblings. I was at school by then, but it was fine – as I looked forward to evenings with Dad.

I'd sit near the sink and watch him shave; talk about my day while he applied a dab o' Brylcreem to his carefully positioned "comb-over do", and listen attentively to his fatherly wisdom while he completed his final act of grooming - splashing the Old Spice aftershave onto his freshly shaven face – yikes. {My legs get goose-bumps at the very thought of such an act.}

I twirled at those special moments – spending one-on-one time with Daddy. In those precious moments I was not just "number 4-of-7" I was his one and only Baby Girl (don't tell my sisters). It was as if all other six siblings were distant memories.

Dad's words have always been my comfort, whether spoken or written ~ his cards are meticulously chosen and always signed with personal thoughts. In his words - his voice - I find peace and security; feel assured of life and hope; and know the strength and wisdom he represents.

~

Remembering even farther back… when we lived overseas,Daddy would tuck me in last at bedtime (well, I was number 4-of-4 then and THE Baby Girl). After reading (sometimes instead of) the books he would tell stories – describing his day in the form of a story book (seems we were sans Dr. Seuss over there). Gradually he would switch gears and the story became about how life compares to the life of Joseph or King David in the Old Testament or Nicodemus and how Saul became Paul in the New Testament. Sometimes it was whatever he had studied from the Bible for the next day's classes to teach at the West African Bible College.

~

What exactly created this emotional flashback anyway?

Hmmm.

Earlier tonight I was having a conversation with Dad. He was describing his day at the hospital. He told me in detail "all" that happened throughout the day: he took 2 walks with the nurse; visited with his older sister; Mom brought my niece - Baby Girl to visit and she wanted to take home the BIG bear my boys and I brought for Papa. Every visitor commented on Jeffrey's colorful drawing which Grandma taped to the front of the shelf.

Dad's story was building to its climax as he proudly exclaimed he had his first solids. =)

~

As he described his first meal selection for dinner, it all came rushing back...

Pancakes and scrambled eggs for dinner ~ Dad's favorite meal!

We often would have breakfast foods at dinnertime to celebrate Dad being with family for dinner before he had to leave for work at night – most of the time to give Mom a break, he would prepare that meal.

~

Funny, I never made a connection that breakfast at dinner time with Dad was such a comfort. So without the calories of comfort food – the thought of my Dad eating his favorite meal sans tube, false teeth and all, I am twirling like I did as a little girl.

Settling in for bed I remember the sweet, strong sound of Dad's voice telling his day-in-a-life story; my mind, heart, and body at rest for the night.

HonuGirl

Now that's the real thing...

She can breathe again.

Hospitals, illness, anxiety and stress seem inseparable.

I'm child #4, daughter #2 and #1 BabyGirl -- it has been four days since I'd heard my Dad's voice; well, other than a groan or painful "uh-huh" in response to a comfort question.

I called my Mum tonight checking on his status. She happened to be at his side in the hospital room visiting with two of their dearest friends.

We talked for a short while about his comfort, ability to communicate and his medical situation. Which was a relief, as the surgeon shared today that she would like to try a different option rather than immediately offer her remarkable skills with a scalpel to his bowel.

Yeah, it didn't sound any better as an unwritten thought.

~

Dad was sleeping when I called so I didn't want Mum to wake him; I asked her to tell him how many people were praying for him and which family members had emailed me to share their love and good wishes.

As she finished another story, I asked her to tell her friends "hello" from me; she did so, and I heard each of them respond with a "hello JoJo" in the background.

... and as if he could feel my anxiety my Dad made a noise that sound like "haah" which Mum interpreted as "hi".

I was grateful and at peace hearing even that much from him; but as I was saying "tell him I love him and I'll see him soon" -- the phone had already shuffled to his mouth and I heard him clearly say "HI! and THAT's the real thing!" in an almost normal voice.

It was the most he'd said to me while I sat in his room on Sunday; to me it was like a week's worth of discussions -- whew!!

Despite the fact that I can't breathe from a darn cold caught as soon as I left the hospital -- I am breathing freely -- as Daddy's little girl feels a whole lot better!!

That's the REAL thing!!!

HonuGirl

Plans change...

Oh how I wanted to rest today.

I had high hopes of writing a blog today.

I wanted to go to church today.

I had a to-do list a mile long for today.

The boys wanted to go see their Aunt J today.

**

I did not want to be in the hospital waiting room worrying and wondering today.

I did not want to hear that my Dad had being admitted here.

I did not want to hear the doctor say they can't determine why he was bleeding internally.

**

I was comforted to be with all six of my siblings today.

I was glad when I heard the bleeding had ceased.

I was happy to know Dad's vitals and blood count were within normal range.

I was relieved to know that he will be resting in the hospital (with pain meds administered); until such time as they can answer the "unknowns".

**

Now, I blog to say please pray ... just as I know plans change

... prayer changes things too!!

blogging off for now...