Moments of Mom anxiety ...

He's... leavin' on a jet plane

Excited to be leaving for Priority mission ~ on his way to Denver, to sing, work, sing, paint, sing ... and then more helping at food banks, senior centers, churches, homeless shelters ... and the list goes on.  

Saturday finally arrived... amazingly, he was the first one awake in the house (even before Millie).

I was proud, indeed ... and, uh also taken aback by such energy and non-stop conversation by this teen so early in the morning.  Off to the airport; turning back for “just one *wait... what?*  photo.”

        

At the airport he gathered with the group, checked his own baggage... (paid the $25 fee) which he was able to afford because of  the gracious gift of funds from thoughtful, generous (incredible) friends of ours who insisted on giving even after he met his goal for which -- thank you is not enough!  

Stealthily we followed the group of kids toward security ... where I was so grateful he wore his red jacket and was the tallest kid in the sea of bobbing heads walking through security.... I tip-toed and stared until I couldn't see anything but strangers ... then Sweet-T finally said "he's gone through the security gate and is already around the corner ~ we can go now."  Then we left. 

Going home it felt like I left part of me behind ... I miss that boy!  I know he's having fun, working hard, and being a blessing to many ... I'm excited that he will have new stories to share when he returns and I know he will be different from the kid I left at the airport.  

One of the first texts he sent was after he made his first purchase ... 

  it simply said            "I hate sales tax"

   

Another series of texts described his worry for a friend who didn't have enough money for meals for the whole week ...  then wrote that he and two other students agreed to share her food expenses to make sure she could eat.   [thanks again to the generosity of family and friends who gave so much support - he's able to pass along your kindness]

—   I love this kid!!!

He's been gone about a hundred hours now ... but who's counting?

Brother misses him too!

not instinct ...

... intentional
 

... the moment when you feel its release 

... the joy and wonder of living in the present, not the past

... the realization that you gifted yourself by giving it to others

... finally understanding 

Loving ... 
                Forgiving ...
                                   Living with intention.

     H o n u  g i r l 

Words … 15 minutes ...

time ...  L I F E

We have 15 minutes travel time -- should be en route to the car ... Mom's waiting to drive him -- where is her son?

Jason:    half dressed after a shower ...  rushes down the hall – into living room…

                        stops at the desk to pick up paper and pen …  

                  sits down on the couch, where he puts on one shoe – a shirt –  then

                        curiously sinks into deep thought  as he begins to scribble ...

                 with two feet in shoes he stops once again to put to pen a few lines --

                        a momentary glance toward ceiling ... brow is crinkled – eyes focused  …

                his arms somehow find his coat sleeves ...  words written a few at a time -- 

                          walks toward door – still pressing pen across paper - words in motion

               

Mom:   No  hurry - i’m just the chauffeur - simply hoping son  managed to get completely dressed before leaving ~  "check"

Jason:      furiously writing while Mom drives . . . no conversation, no stereo, no ear buds, no texting or iTouch ... only pen - paper- words - phrases... 

    

   Jason:    a mile before we get to church...   "I promised Pastor Caleb I would write him a poem for youth group - thanks for waiting, Mom.   You wanna hear it?"

Feeling alone is a lie

God will never just stand by.

Everything that happens is in His plan alone

Nothing we have or do is really our own

Because He loves us, He lets us win.

We shouldn't be alive because of our sins.

We make mistakes in every way

but He will always forgive us, each and every day.

Others may live for satisfaction and greed

but for us ... Jesus is all we need.

We are his children, his little girls and boys

That's why He give us His peace, patience and joy.

Just like Jesus who died on the cross

We need to live His word, every one of us.

Christianity is hard and it's no game

But was worth Jesus' life - His suffering and pain

I want it to be easy to see

how much His love has changed me

We are able to split the Red Sea

all we need to do is open our eyes and believe.

2.20.13     ~ by  Jason Lyon

God's gift to my son ... words!

 God's gift to me ...  Jason!

     H o n u  g i r l                         

a moment to be grateful for all things

                                                   H o n u  g i r l                         

Got power ?

... many thanks to a few diagnostic friends and Sweet-T's extra power supply (stripped from an unused computer in the garage) ...

my computer LIVES again -- whoo hoo!

I'm so glad to have my computer in tact. Hmm, could it be that simple? I sometimes feel like my power supply is zapped -- are there extras anywhere for me? If only it were that easy... hah!

No worries though, I believe my technology is fully functional (monitor is still working). More than I can say for my eyes which feel rather scratchy right now.

Well -- I am ignoring my need for a new cell phone and headset. It's just gona have to wait a while.

=)

One big relief was that the school photo discs were ejected unscathed (since the drives locked down when my computer died, slight concern for photos disc noted).

Here they are -- Jason and Jeffrey 2009

YES, really, it's them. I keep testing their history to be sure they are mine; it seems only yesterday they were a mere 6 and 9. But, here before you is a 12 year old Jason (whose sometimes I'd say was preparing for college) and Jeffrey who is 9 (and seems much more like a teen than I'd expect). I'm glad it's just them as I'm not getting older -- I figure with age, it's a calendar and I'm turning the page.

=)

Some presents are wrapped and the tree's decorated.

The computer is humming a quiet, steady (sans clicking) tune. My brain however is in need of some sleep.

Thanks for being there for me my techie friends -- love ya!!

HonuGirl

Thanksgiving

Jason: "I'm thankful that God gave us you for a Mom. I'm thankful that you are not one of those 'over-protective' moms; you just say don't do drugs, don't smoke, try not to kill each other before breakfast -- oh, and be careful of sharp objects"

Jeffrey:

"Yeah, and you let us know if we don't get up on time -- we WILL be late."

Now that's the real thing...

She can breathe again.

Hospitals, illness, anxiety and stress seem inseparable.

I'm child #4, daughter #2 and #1 BabyGirl -- it has been four days since I'd heard my Dad's voice; well, other than a groan or painful "uh-huh" in response to a comfort question.

I called my Mum tonight checking on his status. She happened to be at his side in the hospital room visiting with two of their dearest friends.

We talked for a short while about his comfort, ability to communicate and his medical situation. Which was a relief, as the surgeon shared today that she would like to try a different option rather than immediately offer her remarkable skills with a scalpel to his bowel.

Yeah, it didn't sound any better as an unwritten thought.

~

Dad was sleeping when I called so I didn't want Mum to wake him; I asked her to tell him how many people were praying for him and which family members had emailed me to share their love and good wishes.

As she finished another story, I asked her to tell her friends "hello" from me; she did so, and I heard each of them respond with a "hello JoJo" in the background.

... and as if he could feel my anxiety my Dad made a noise that sound like "haah" which Mum interpreted as "hi".

I was grateful and at peace hearing even that much from him; but as I was saying "tell him I love him and I'll see him soon" -- the phone had already shuffled to his mouth and I heard him clearly say "HI! and THAT's the real thing!" in an almost normal voice.

It was the most he'd said to me while I sat in his room on Sunday; to me it was like a week's worth of discussions -- whew!!

Despite the fact that I can't breathe from a darn cold caught as soon as I left the hospital -- I am breathing freely -- as Daddy's little girl feels a whole lot better!!

That's the REAL thing!!!

HonuGirl

Another Reminder...

God's been good to me!!

My boys LOVE to sing.  

I LOVE to hear them sing.

When they sing in unison my world becomes as effortless and calm as their beautiful harmony.

  

The other day while driving I was enjoying just such a moment; when Jeffrey’s voice faded from our "Love You Out Loud" ensemble.  The song ended moments after and he called out in a somewhat serious tone:  

“MOM, are you smiling?”   

[Uhh, not sure if I was… until he asked and I smiled as if it were my cue.]  So I  happily announced, “Yes, Buddy, I am!”

 

“Good.” He affirmed… “Because I have been smiling and waving at lots of drivers and only one smiled back at me.”  

 

“Mom, why don’t people smile when they are driving?”

 

Whoosh… a hurricane of thoughts began storming through my mind.  Could it be they are afraid of the nation’s economic state; or perhaps they are feeling trapped financially; or tragically sad from family problems or emotionally torn into pieces from life’s challenges… oh my how – I struggled with what to say???

 

Which is exactly why I responded with something trite about other drivers concentrating on the road AND that it's a good thing I have incredible kids in the back seat to remind me of wonderful reasons to smile.  =)

 

This smile thing reminds me of a quote from a friend of mine:  “if you’re alive … notify your face!”

We finished our trip home waving at other drivers and all of us singing blissfully & unabashedly LOUD with Keith Urban's "God's Been Good to Me!!"   Listen...  

I was SMILING out loud  "smack dab in the middle of paradise"!   

HonuGirl

Hugs & Kisses

... are no longer on my list of what I Miss!!!

Guess who got back today?

Da bright-eyed boyz who had been away

stories changed, so much to say; my boyz, sweet boyz came home this day!!!

aww... for me?   

HonuGirl

 

Another Reminder...

God's been good to me!!

My boys LOVE to sing.  

I LOVE to hear them sing.

When they sing in unison my world becomes as effortless and calm as their beautiful harmony.

  

The other day while driving I was enjoying just such a moment; when Jeffrey’s voice faded from our "Love You Outloud" ensemble.  The song ended moments after and he called out in a somewhat serious tone:  

“MOM, are you smiling?”   

[Uhh, not sure if I was… until he asked and I smiled as if it were my cue.]  So I  happily announced, “Yes, Buddy, I am!”

 

“Good.” He affirmed… “Because I have been smiling and waving at lots of drivers and only one smiled back at me.”  

 

“Mom, why don’t people smile when they are driving?”

 

Whoosh… a hurricane of thoughts began storming through my mind.  Could it be they are afraid of the nation’s economic state; or perhaps they are feeling trapped financially; or tragically sad from family problems or emotionally torn into pieces from life’s challenges… oh my how – I struggled with what to say???

 

Which is exactly why I responded with something trite about other drivers concentrating on the road AND that it's a good thing I have incredible kids in the back seat to remind me of wonderful reasons to smile.  =)

 

This smile thing reminds me of a quote from a friend of mine:  “if you’re alive … notify your face!”

We finished our trip home waving at drivers and us all unabashedly singing LOUD and happy with Keith Urban:   "God's Been Good to Me!!"    =)

I was SMILING out loud  "smack dab in the middle of paradise"!

HonuGirl